


Five Times

by Zoisite Ruby (andadobeslabs)



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Alisaie/Thancred sorta but not really, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Scenes with a Shipping Twist, Coils Spoilers, Drabble Collection, F/M, Guilt, Heavensward Spoilers, Jealousy, Mutual Pining, Post-Break Up, Stormblood Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-31 00:15:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12120393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andadobeslabs/pseuds/Zoisite%20Ruby
Summary: Four times Urianger wants to kiss Alisaie, but shouldn't. One time he kisses her anyway.





	Five Times

**Author's Note:**

> To orient this with my other Alisaie/Urianger fics, the first 4 sections take place before any of my other works, the last takes place after all but Disclosure. I wrote this on my phone on an airplane so I apologize in advance if I missed any of my typos. If you were wondering, "Bahamut" really likes to autocorrect to "Bahamas" and "Chocobo" to "Chocoholic".

Urianger may have missed them altogether if not for Minfilia’s very audible cooing reaching him from the library. “Look how much you’ve _grown_!”

These words pique his interest, not having seen many children around the Sands as of late. He quickly shuffles to the Solar. When he sees the two white-haired elezen standing in front of the antecedent, he frowns. Why had Fourchenault not warned him of this?

“Urianger!” Alisaie exclaims as soon as she recognizes him but immediately attempts to rid herself of any outward eagerness. Trying to appear nonchalant, she crosses her arms and smirks. “It’s been a while.” She wasn't wrong, the last time he’d seen either of them was shortly after the Calamity when he had made the trip to pledge his service to house Leveilleur in honor of Louisoix’s sacrifice.

Alphinaud, enthusiastic as ever to hear himself speak, chats with Minfilia. Urianger overhears something about an adventurer Alphinaud been following (and that Papalymo and Yda had already informed the Scions of a while ago). Urianger and Alisaie stand around awkwardly, neither of them much of conversationalists and both of them preferring to avoid whatever it was that Alphinaud was going on about a short distance away. Urianger briefly summarizes some of the Scions’ recent activities, worries about mysterious men in black robes and disappearing crystals. Alisaie complains about how inadequate her education on the Twelveswood had been, the concepts of the Elementals and woodsin missing from any of her reading.

Thancred wanders in eventually as well, rescuing Urianger from the uncomfortable banter by interjecting himself into their conversation. “You’ve become quite the beautiful young woman, Lady Alisaie.” Thancred flatters and Alisaie blushes. Embarrassed, she looks away from the bard and to Urianger, which only makes her blush harder. After a deep inhale, she narrows her eyes and turns back.

“Unfortunately, my supposed _beauty_ will unlikely aid me in my goal of saving the realm,” Alisaie explains, trying to mask her insecurity and shyness. Involuntarily, Urianger does a quick inventory of Alisaie’s features. She’s short, both because of her age and her family, and thin. She looks similar to her brother, wearing the same outfit, the skin on her side and her outer thigh visible through windows of fabric, though she’s softer in the face and body. Her lips are also redder than Alphinaud’s, possibly because of a cosmetic of some kind. He contemplates them longer than he realizes.

Thancred clears his throat, and when Urianger looks at him, he raises his eyebrow. “Anyway, as much as I hate to interrupt this reunion, I came to speak with Urianger. Do you mind if I steal him away for a moment?”

Alisaie nods and Urianger quickly follows the other Scion out of the Solar, embarrassed but not quite sure why. Thancred doesn’t say anything initially, only smiles smugly. “Yes? You implied this was urgent?”

“Oh, nothing important.” Thancred crosses his arms, “I just didn’t want to have fun at your expense in front of everyone else.”

Annoyed, “Out with it then.”

“Just now you seemed rather… distracted by the fairer Leveilleur.” Thancred observes, and Urianger shakes his head. “One might even say taken.”

“You are mistaken.” Urianger defends himself. Admittedly, the thought of Alisaie’s unusually red lips against his very briefly crossed his mind, but he has no intention of acting on it. At sixteen summers old, she was only barely old enough to be considered an adult, let alone an appropriate candidate for romance. Additionally, her family had entrusted him with the protection of both of the Leveilleur twins. She likely saw Urianger as more of a protective brother than anything else. “’Tis not unlike suggesting you have less than pure feelings about our antecedent.”

Thancred laughs at that, “If that helps you sleep at night, friend.” His amusement only growing, “I am no stranger to infatuation. It is rather my area of expertise, after all.” Urianger keeps a straight face, attempting to hide his annoyance. “You are a man of good taste, Urianger. First Moenbryda and now-“

“We are done discussing this.” Urianger asserts and turns to walk back into the Solar. Thancred smirks at the back of his head.

* * *

She’s safe. ‘ _They’re Safe_ ,' Urianger corrects himself.

The Leveilleur twins stood a distance away, Master Alphinaud explaining away their lateness as a result of having taken the “scenic route.” Urianger gasps. Amused, the Warrior of Light crosses their arms.

“By the heavens! Look at you!” He sprints to them, “What horrors your young eyes must have seen! What suffering your young bodies must have borne!” He turns to Alisaie specifically, “Pray tell me—where are you hurt? Your wounds must needs be cleansed and dressed at once! I shall make for you a poultice which draweth out—“

Alisaie laughs, “Be at ease, my friend! We are hale and whole, I assure you!” She smiles to dismiss his concern, “We took a few tumbles, but the worst of our hurts are healed. I believe we have Grandfather to thank for that.”

He remembers the fear on Alisaie’s face when she explained to Urianger what she had found in the coils. “Master Louisoix? Then you met with him once more? But wherefore should Bahamut’s thrall seek to ease your suffering?”

“I promise to reveal all to you in due course, dear friend. But first, there is a matter which requires our immediate attention.” She stands determined, “Now that Bahamut is defeated, we deem it best to bar entry to all the fragments of Dalamud. To this end, we will convince the nations’ leaders that the danger is past, and invite their cooperation in ensuring that the fragments are never again disturbed. Come, let us depart and seek an audience with them forthwith.”

Since parting with the Scions, Alisaie has been driven almost entirely by a desire to unearth what remains in the Coils. Her sudden insistence of hiding the truth concerns Urianger, knowing that whatever she’s found must truly warrant the secrecy. Her interest in involving herself politically was unusual as well. She looks up at Urianger hopefully, though, seeking permission to proceed or confirmation that he might help her. Despite her eyes sparkling and her face covered in all manners of dirt and soot, Urianger finds his gaze drifting to her lips. She really was stunning, the time she spent away from the rest of them made him appreciate her rare presence even more. He catalogs the moment in his memory, Alisaie radiating pride despite caution for the future and melancholy over what she had discovered. He had truly worried she may never return, even with her brother and the Warrior of Light by her side. But she is alive when he might not have been in her same situation, and she’s only a dozen ilms from him. How easy it would be to close that gap...

Fortunately, Alphinaud interrupts that thought. “A moment, Sister. You need not burden yourself with this task. Urianger and I will more than suffice. Might you not take this opportunity to rest? The gods know you have earned it.”

“But I am fine, Brother. Besides, you have been through as much as I have.” Alisaie’s eyes narrow, “Oh, I see now! You would play your game of diplomacy, and wish me out of the way!”

“N-No, I… Naught could be farther from the truth, Alisaie.” The sibling rivalry before him very abruptly reminds Urianger of the twins’ youth. They may be adults in status, but the way Alisaie stands with her arms crossed distracts from the subject of their argument. Urianger smiles, fortunate that their experience facing Bahamut and his followers had not forced them to grow beyond their years. All the more reason his fondness for her is inappropriate and needs to be controlled. Now was the time to be a mentor to Alisaie, not a lover.

“My lady, ’tis mine earnest belief that your brother hath your best interests at heart. You have more than done your part, and he desireth but to relieve you of a burden he might easily bear alone.”

“I have some experience treating with dignitaries, you must allow. And as you never fail to remind me of my fondness for diplomacy, I feel it only right that I remind you of your aversion to it.” Alisaie looks between her brother and Urianger, resignation on her face. She knows they have a point. All the better, Urianger thinks, secretly thankful for the opportunity to separate himself from the subject of his unwelcome feelings, at least long enough to distance said feelings from his relief at her safety. “Then it is settled. Urianger— pray make arrangements for a Chocobo carriage. The ride should give us ample time to prepare our story.”

Urianger and Alisaie share a brief moment of tense eye contact. He nods at her reassuringly, trying to silently communicate that she has nothing to worry about, everyone is proud of her, and recognition of something clearly occurs as she nods, and with that, he follows behind her brother, “Alphinaud!” She interrupts, and they both turn. “Though our paths are different, we share the same goal, do we not?”

All but confirmation that this implies Alisaie intends to disappear again, Urianger is conflicted. Alphinaud speaks, “But of course, dear sister. That which we have achieved together stands as testament to that fact. Whatever path we choose to take, our hearts shall ever lead us to the same end, of that I am certain.”

“Thank you.” They leave her with the Warrior of Light.

* * *

“I sense that you will offer more than mere target practice. Unlike your sister.” The Ranger points out to Alphinaud. Urianger watches from afar, afraid to intervene and disrupt the natural progression of his plans. He knows Alisaie still recovers from injury, having heard from Thancred that she took a poisoned arrow and has been with her brother and the Warrior of Light in Ishgard ever since.

He almost steps in when a blast pushes Alisaie back, causing her brother to cry out.

“Did… Did I not tell you, Alphinaud? I am not the girl I once was.” Blood drips from her mouth as she speaks, but she wipes it away. “My brother was always the clever one, while my talents lay elsewhere.” She pulls out her codex and summons a blade made entirely of aether. _That is new_. To the warriors now, “If you would dare to stand against us, to destroy all that we hold dear, then you shall die by my sword!”

Rather than allowing the Warrior of Light to do as they usually would, Alisaie takes charge in the battle against the Warriors of Darkness as their adventurer friend focuses on dealing damage. While Urianger has known Alisaie to be proficient in magic, he had not known she had become a paladin as well. He’s blown away by how efficiently she moves, blocking blows intended for her brother as if it requires hardly any effort at all. Now eighteen summers old, she was certainly correct, she was not the girl she once was. He knows that his friends won't win, but it's not until they are trapped by magic chains that Urianger finally steps in, shattering the bonds before the Warriors of Darkness can do any more damage to the Scions.

“What?”

“The chains!”

Arbert turns to Urianger in anger and shock, “You snake. You would betray us as well?”

“He that holdeth fast unto his convictions shall never count betrayal amongst his crimes, though all the world may call him villain. My path is unchanged, my creed sacrosanct. This I believe with all my heart. But say, Warrior of Darkness, and speak true — what doest Thou believe? That rendering up the souls of thy world in service to the Rejoining will grant it salvation? Nay.”

“By the Twelve— Urianger!” Alphinaud recognizes him first, possibly because of his appearance and possibly because of his voice.

Perhaps more dramatically than necessary, Urianger rips off the mask covering the bottom half of his face. “Mine apologies, Master Alphinaud. That the brightest light might shine, duty did compel me to walk in darkest shade.”

“You sweet fool. I was almost willing to believe you had turned against us.” Alisaie does not look at Urianger directly, disappointing him more than he expects. “I expect a full explanation when this is over. For now, may I assume you have turned your cloak for the last time?”

“Thou mayest, my lady.” He cannot help but allow some affection to seep into his tone, “By thy leave.”

“Even odds then. No matter. We’ll crush the lot of you in one fell swoop.”

“Understood.” The Magus of Darkness begins to cast a spell.

“Hearken to me! We only have one chance!” Alisaie commands, “Channel your aether into my blade that I might strike before the mage casts his spell! I cannot do it alone, but together… Together we can defeat them!”

He glances longingly at her as she gets reassuring nods from the rest of the Scions. In more ways than one, Urianger felt as if this was his last chance. When she finally discovered the depths of his betrayal, she would surely never speak to him again, let alone return his affections for her.

Unfortunately, there was no time for that now. Condemning his love to perpetually be unrequited seems a fair bargain for saving an entire world, as much as it hurt him to do it.

* * *

“Twelve be praised! Full sure was I that I had come too late.” Alisaie smiles at him warmly as she stands on the dock outside Limsa Lominsa.

“Urianger? Tell me you haven’t come all this way just to see us off.” Her eyes give away that she is, in fact, happy that he had come all that way, regardless of whether or not it was only to them off.

“Nay, my lady.” He somewhat lies, “Ere you quit these shores for eastern climes, I wished to share some words of seeming import. _‘Look ye where the sun doth rise, see crimson embers, dark’ning skies… Look ye where the sun doth fall, see azure lost amidst the squall._ ’”

She chuckles silently, “Well that sounds suitably foreboding. Another one of your prophecies, I presume?”

“Of Far Eastern origins, aye. It is mine earnest hope that this ancient wisdom may serve to guide you on your journey, for what dangers lie in wait for you upon those distant shores are yet beyond my knowing.” He reveals his vulnerability then, genuine worry that he can not protect her. In all honesty, however, she was more than capable of protecting herself.

Alisaie sighs affectionately, “A parting gift befitting your roundabout ways. Thank you.” He almost missed it, but for a split second, he sees her eyes drift to his lips. _This was… unusual._

“I have more than words for you, my lady.” Her eyes widen, and she blushes, possibly misunderstanding his intent until he hands her his gift.

“It’s beautiful… is it for me?” Distracted from whatever she thought he had implied, she runs her fingers over the weapon in awe. Satisfaction spreads through Urianger warmly as she inspects it.

“Though undeniably powerful, your aetherial blade taxeth you greatly in the wielding. Not so this rapier, which shall serve you just as well ‘gainst all but the most formidable foe.”

“Impressive… It feels as though it’s attuned to my aether. I shall treasure it.” He notices it again, her expression suddenly changing to one unfamiliar. Nervousness mixed with some manner of excitement. Her face is flushed, and she bites her lip, bringing attention to it. Something stirs within Urianger, excitement, trepidation, fear of the unknown.

“Honored guests!” A pirate interrupts and Alisaie coughs awkwardly. “Say your farewells, for the moment of our parting draws nigh! A fair wind blows, and I mean to follow it!”

“It would seem our ship is set to sail. Pray, give my regards to Thancred and the others. And…” She gazes at him questioningly, clearly giving him permission to act if he so chose to, but he hesitates. “Take care.”

She leaves, looking back at him once before she boards, disappointed.

* * *

Alisaie huffs loudly in the doorway of the common area, before dramatically taking a long drink from her flask. Urianger and Thancred sit across from each other at a table, both of them reading in silence.

“Where have you been?” Thancred asks before any kind of greeting and she rolls her eyes.

“Saving the realm and whatnot.” She slurs, wandering over to the two of them.

“While drinking an entire gallon of spirits?” He questions and she shrugs.

“Makes me fight better.” She approaches Thancred and stands close. Urianger attempts desperately not to acknowledge her, even when she puts her hand on Thancred’s shoulder and squeezes a bit, eventually allowing it to wander around his arm suggestively.

“Can I help you with something?” The rogue asks, chuckling, and she hums in agreement.

“I can think of a few things.” A sultry tone enters her voice then, her massaging touches becoming more teasing. Thancred snaps his head around to look at her, freezing when he sees a still bleeding scratch across her collarbone.

“You’re injured.” She withdraws her hand and attempts to shift her balance onto her other foot, a more defensive position, but she stumbles.

“’Tis fine.” She dismisses, and Thancred gives Urianger an apologetic look, though he had long since resigned himself to staring off into the distance to avoid witnessing their interaction.

“You’re covered in blood.”

“Most of it isn’t mine.” Thancred sighs then, standing to help her and she leans against him. “Though I guess you’ll have to take me to my room and get a closer look.”

Thancred irritatedly groans and props her up by wrapping her arm around his neck. Urianger watches guiltily as Thancred walks her off.

This was his fault. Urianger has no right to be jealous, he gave up any claim of such a right when he ended things, even though it was for her own good.

A few minutes later, Alisaie returns and scans the room. She finds her target sitting where she had left him, eyes in his book. She clears her throat to “Thancred not entertaining this evening?”

“I’m sorry about that.” She admits, visibly sobering up at the disdain and annoyance in his voice.

“’Tis always sad to see a desperate maiden throwing herself at Thancred as if they expect something more.” She steps back at this, eyes starting to water. Apparently, he had struck a nerve.

“Why…” She practically cries out, “Are you trying to hurt me?”

She sobs for a moment, and he almost softens, desperate to reach out to her and comfort her but also knowing that it’s for the best this way. If she hates him, maybe she’ll be able to return to how she had been before they knew every inch of the other’s skin and soul.

She’s vulnerable, he knows. ‘ _’Tis similar to what thou had expected of me’_ was all kept the two of them from becoming unreconcilable.

She interrupts him before he can say it, “You do realize I could not care less what my family thinks? I would announce my love for you to the entire realm. I have no regrets.” Her voice still wavers, shaky from the crying. “My parents have no place in my relationships. Only the Twelve can judge me.”

He wants to tell her that she’s too young to make that kind of declaration, to accept that both she and her children will no longer benefit from the privilege that her father and grandfather had worked so hard to pass on. Urianger may have respect in Eorzea as a Scion, but he was nobody to Sharlayan. He lacked the Gil and influence that someone such as Alisaie would enjoy if she just obeyed customs and married someone from an equally influential family who did not deserve her.

He had seen it happen to women before her, ones whose sparks of drive had been snuffed by their domestic responsibilities. Women who had graduated at the top of their class from the Studium only to marry a man that did not respect them, resolving them to a life of monotony and missed potential.

Could he really let that happen to Alisaie, though?

Maybe it was selfish, but he knew his answer.

She braces herself for his response, expecting the worst and sobbing again prematurely. She looks like a mess. Her hair is undone, she has blood on her clothes, and her skin is covered in dirt and sweat and scrapes. Her face is wet from a combination of tears and her running nose.

He doesn’t say anything, and instead, stands and approaches her, gently grasping her jaw before leaning down to press his lips against hers as she holds her breath. He suspects if she tries to breathe she might start crying again, so he knows these seconds are numbered. Her lips part immediately, so he kisses her desperately and deeply. He misses the taste of her, even though her mouth is salty from tears he still savors it. She pulls away with a shaky gasp.

“I thought I lost you.” She finally says once she’s able to breathe again. She wraps her arm around his waist and pulls him closer. He’s hypersensitive to the contact, forgetting how it felt to have her against him. It is hard to believe only a moon passed since he ended their relationship. It's obvious that she has a tendency to do this, to disappear for periods of time and surprise him with how she’s grown in her absence. Urianger had come to expect and appreciate it by now, but the woman in his arms is different this time. In addition to the scent of liquor and the injuries that covered her body, their time apart aged and hardened her. She carries herself differently, speaks differently, despite her vulnerability in the moment she still has an unmistakable air of confidence around her. If anyone thought her a child before, they would not now.

In a way, he supposes, he _had_ lost her.

As always, he looks forward to the challenge of getting to know her again.


End file.
